viernes, febrero 19, 2010

Warming Up - Religiously

I really need to read the bible again - to remind myself of why I so enjoyed criticising it in the past.

For those of you that haven't read it, you should just for the incredible bollocks that it spouts.

I think I may have to have a regular Gothic Post, every Friday - just so that the religious nutters have time to polish their foreheads before getting twatted with Gothic wisdom.

Here are a few examples that were "borrowed" from another author:-

Leviticus (25:44) - states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations - cool, that''s Holland fucked

Leviticus (15: 19-24)
- There can be no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Leviticus (1:9) - If you burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord. The problem is, my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

Leviticus (19:27) - Most men get their hair trimmed, even though this is expressly forbidden by . How should they die?

Leviticus (11:6-8) - claims that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but can I still play American football if I wear gloves?

Sorry religious type people - The Goth is back

6 comentarios:

Anónimo dijo...

I am reading this article second time today, you have to be more careful with content leakers. If I will fount it again I will send you a link

john.g. dijo...

YAHOO!

Anónimo dijo...

I really like when people are expressing their opinion and thought. So I like the way you are writing

SpanishGoth dijo...

And so it begins.....

Anónimo dijo...

Do you have copy writer for so good articles? If so please give me contacts, because this really rocks! :)

Ché l'écossais dijo...

1. Only pussies BUY slaves - you must earn them. With your smiting, and all that. Like Conan the Barbarian.

2. The solution is to avoid women altogether.

3. Bull is the essence of all biblical writing. Smite they farkers.

4. Trim their head. And I don't mean that thing at the top of your neck.
This goes for people who wear mixed fibres too.

5.American Football is an abomination in the eyes of our Lord. So, no.

Rabbi Murphy