viernes, agosto 15, 2008

Assumption Day

So, today is Assumption Day - the patron saint of ridiculous notions. It means that if you live in a country where the church (house of stupid ideas) is vaguely popular, you don't have to go to work or anything.

Unfortunately, there's fuck all on TV except a variety of monkeys in cassocks celebrating the fact that the virgin mary got received in heaven (although how they know this is a mystery as there was no CNN then - just a load of blokes with beards writing the shit down afterwards in a rather haphazard fashion).

The definition of assumption in my dictionary is 'assuming; thing assumed; arrogance' and some other burbling shit about some chick having a baby 2,000 years ago without sex, pain or stretch marks.

Now this is blatantly an assumption, but - no pain is good, so I assume it's a good assumption. Which naturally rather leads to the principle that you can have bad assumptions - like it's safe to stand behind an elephant after you've given it a laxative.

As there is no definitive black or white, you must therefore also have other types of assumptions - like slightly twisted assumptions, fucking stupid assumptions or slightly misguided but vaguely believable assumptions.

So, there is my challenge for today - assumption day. What is the stupidest assumption you have ever heard?

39 comentarios:

zoe dijo...

Telling the Twat a few days ago that today is Assumption Day assuming that he would buy food for today.

He didn't.

Daphne Wayne-Bough dijo...

I assumed I would meet some intelligent friends through blogging. Oh well.

Sewmouse dijo...

As a child, I assumed I would grow up and have a life exactly like Barbara Billingsly on "Leave It To Beaver", 2 kids, huge house in the suburbs, patient and loving husband and able to do my housework wearing heels and a fresh frock and pearls.

It is to laugh.

Anónimo dijo...

I assumed someone who constantly carps on about the idiocy of others would be a little more self aware.
Vida

john.g. dijo...

I assumed you were religious!

Lynx dijo...

I assumed that the bollards on the pavement of the Place de Lux were made from foam rubber.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Zoe -> not good - dry crackers all round then

Daphne -> intelligent bloggers? hmmm - did it not happen then?

Sewmouse -> but you could get a husband who wears frocks and does housework - the Queen managed it

Vida -> awareness is a state of mind not a projection though and a carp is a fish

JG -> ha ha - right behind Di in the queue I'll be

Lynx -> Bolloards / Bollocks - not a good combination

Elaine dijo...

I assumed it would last forever. I'll never do that again!

Elaine dijo...
Este comentario ha sido eliminado por el autor.
Tje de Schot dijo...

I assumed Belgian children were taught both major national languages automatically.

And that the Prime Minister kens the national anthem.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Elaine -> it can last forever, in an eternal discrepency of the space/time continuum

Sun Tje -> there is a slight flaw in the system called 'dial-ects' - it's like 'dial a friend' but they haven't a clue what you're talking about

Krimo dijo...

Great to see that you're still "en forme"!

( . )( . ) dijo...

How have I never heard of this assumption day. And why dont I get a day off for it???

( . )( . ) dijo...
Este comentario ha sido eliminado por el autor.
SpanishGoth dijo...

Krimo -> Some things come and go, Goth likes to remain the same

Boobs -> perhaps they don't have religion in Australia? Have a free Gothic holiday on me :-)

( . )( . ) dijo...

Ok sure. Can you write my boss a note though.

Goths day off has a certain 'Arnas a bludger and taking a sickie' ring to it :P

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