Sorry, my little Goth Cadets if you have visited the Goth Cave expecting to find some interesting - or even new stuff.
I have been ultra-busy trying to ensure I can have a holiday and not live in a cardboard box afterwards (as that's soggy and shit). In order to achieve this, I have had to do a semblance of that normality type crap - i.e. actually going to work etc.
Granted, some smart-arsed twats might mention that I don't do anything anyway, so what's different - but they know nothing.
After easing myself back behind my 'bat-computer' at work, I have had a lot of people coming to ask to see my shaving cut. Granted, it's fuck-all compared to Johnny G-Had's injury but it's still good for making people puke and generally run away.
When I have finished pretending to work, I have to visit a Physiotherapist (Kine - here in Belgique) and she attempts to prove that you cannot pull my thumb off. It's a fucking stupid idea as I nearly severed it completely, but I assume it is to prove that the superglue they use in the hospitals here works.
Just when I think it can't get any worse, I discover that the week before I depart on holiday, we are getting audited by:-
(Alan) Price - looking for his dancing bear
Waterhouse - checking why their books don't balance on the bear
and (Lee) Cooper - wondering why the jeans don't fit the bear at all.
Well, fucking hoozah !!
Now, for those of you that haven't met me - I am really lovely and not sarcastic at all. In fact, butterflies land on me all the time.
For those that do actually know me, it was probably not a good day for PWC to come looking for their balancing bear. I can, on Mariposas life, declare it was the fastest interview with an Auditor I have ever been present at (I even had to go back to get the free drinks as I forgot at the time).
Probably a good time for a Gothic holiday then.....