martes, agosto 12, 2008

Apologies to Goth Cadets

Sorry, my little Goth Cadets if you have visited the Goth Cave expecting to find some interesting - or even new stuff.

I have been ultra-busy trying to ensure I can have a holiday and not live in a cardboard box afterwards (as that's soggy and shit). In order to achieve this, I have had to do a semblance of that normality type crap - i.e. actually going to work etc.

Granted, some smart-arsed twats might mention that I don't do anything anyway, so what's different - but they know nothing.

After easing myself back behind my 'bat-computer' at work, I have had a lot of people coming to ask to see my shaving cut. Granted, it's fuck-all compared to Johnny G-Had's injury but it's still good for making people puke and generally run away.

When I have finished pretending to work, I have to visit a Physiotherapist (Kine - here in Belgique) and she attempts to prove that you cannot pull my thumb off. It's a fucking stupid idea as I nearly severed it completely, but I assume it is to prove that the superglue they use in the hospitals here works.

Just when I think it can't get any worse, I discover that the week before I depart on holiday, we are getting audited by:-

(Alan) Price - looking for his dancing bear
Waterhouse - checking why their books don't balance on the bear
and (Lee) Cooper - wondering why the jeans don't fit the bear at all.

Well, fucking hoozah !!

Now, for those of you that haven't met me - I am really lovely and not sarcastic at all. In fact, butterflies land on me all the time.

For those that do actually know me, it was probably not a good day for PWC to come looking for their balancing bear. I can, on Mariposas life, declare it was the fastest interview with an Auditor I have ever been present at (I even had to go back to get the free drinks as I forgot at the time).

Probably a good time for a Gothic holiday then.....

10 comentarios:

Anónimo dijo...

My sister worked for PWC awhile back.
I would'nt worry about it. They practically invented Creative Auditing**, that's why they're so popular among the Enron/WorldCom type shucksters. And also major friends of the NuLabor party, though that may be a coincidence.

Anyway, Stock, Aitken & Waterman are a much better corporation. Much better at tax-evasion, anyway.
They gave the world Rick Astley, perhaps the greatest contribution to bandwidth waste in the history of bandwidth waste. The kind of thing that makes ISPs profitable.


a.k.a. **Corporate Fraud, see "Sarbanes-Oxley Act".

Princess of the Universe dijo...

I wouldn't be surprised to find out that butterflies DO land on you all the time.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Che -> I tried to be polite - I really did, but...

And I don't understand - PWC = SAW. WTF is that about you Chesney?

Princess -> they do, because I am sweet (in a Gothic way)

*oooops, tripped over the Wodka again)

Unknown dijo...

Your thumb situation sounds a little too ouch for me. I was cringing just reading about it.

And no, I could never picture butterflies landing on you. Maybe Ravens or Crows... or something along those lines...

Unknown dijo...

See you soon then, Goth?

Daphne Wayne-Bough dijo...

I think you'll find they're moths, Goth. Have a nice holiday in Transylvania.

Ariel dijo...

Ah, the PWC karma strikes again! One day, many years ago in my previous corporate incarnation, I had to go and do a presentation at PWC in the City. I was so anxious I threw up on the train on my way in, turning up sporting the finest shade of green ever seen on a besuited human being. And then on the way home I was mugged.

Leni Qinan dijo...

I didn't know that butterflies landed on you!
Have fun and enjoy your holidays, sweet Goth. And take the butterflies wherever you go. ;))

Ms Kravitz, from the beach.

Pat dijo...

It seems but a moment since you went away. God I sound like a whiny GF.
Have fun and careful with your thumb.

SpanishGoth dijo...

(.)(.) -> butterflies do land on me - when I'm still asleep in the graveyard - the crows just bring me breakfast

JG -> hopefully dude - haven't organised what happens on what day yet - doing a god thing in that respect

Daphne -> I do know the difference between moths and butterflies dear (lepidoptery was a forced subject in the Gothic education system)

Ariel -> boo hiss - don't like muggers (bullys in the real world)

Leni -> Cada día, yo despierto con una mariposa por mi lado. Gracias por sus deseos amables y yo espero que usted disfrute de la playa. Besos

Pat -> it seems like bloody ages to me (and my thumb is fine thankyou)