miércoles, julio 16, 2008

Not Bored Really

So, having returned to work, I found myself ploughing through a zillion e-mails. Whilst my original plan to 'select all' and then delete the bastards, it would be typical that I missed an important one like:-

Dear Goth, congratulations you have won new bionic arms or
Dear Goth, my name is Claudia Schiffer and I would like to sit on your face....


Obviously, I received neither, but as I was scrolling through them, my mind started to wander. I wondered what I would call my band if I was a hedgehog. A few that I came up with were:-

Hedgehog Death Cult
Deep Hedgehog
My Chemical Hedgehog
Hedgehogs Of Mercy
Red Hot Chilli Hedgehogs

Then I went for a cigarette and lost my train of thought. When I sat back down at my computer, one of those annoying American bossy muppets turned up and I inadvertedly blurted out -

"Fuck off pal, we don't have any oil here so go home".

He didn't take my subtle hint so I just ignored him. It was then I remembered something Mr Farty had mentioned in a comment, so I went to look at what he was talking about which was bound to be more interesting.

Well, bugger me backwards with a pitchfork. He has nominated me for some awardy thingy. Normally, I don't give a flying fuck about these sort of things but as it is The Fartmaster himself, I figured I'd do him the courtesy of acknowledging it. More about this tomorrow though......

7 comentarios:

Leni Qinan dijo...

I heard Claudia got married and only sits on her hubby’s face at the moment.
And to be honest... bionic arms don't go with your goth outfit. You would look flashy.

I like My Chemical Hedgehog. Red Hot Chili Hedgehogs are cool too.:)

About the awardy thingy, if you only checked your comments to your last post more carefully, you wouldn't have missed that you had been oscarized yesterday. Congrats. I bet you will also have a fanclub soon, LOL.

Ms Kravitz

PS.-Isn't it great to be back to work? (falls off her chair)

Sewmouse dijo...

Teenage Mutant Deathsquad Hedgehogs?

Ok, yeah, that sucked.

So how many bones did you break in that hand that you're not getting fixed?

john.g. dijo...

Hedgehog crisps....again!

I got nailed by Farty too!

SpanishGoth dijo...

Leni -> I don't think Mariposa came home and found some bimbo sitting on my face

Sewmouse -> only 2 I think but as I said, nothing fell off so it doesn't matter

JG -> I saw that which, kinda fucked up my cunning and watertight plan to name you

( . )( . ) dijo...

I want bionic arms. I am totally jealous. This is an email I received this morning:

Hi! How are you doing? I hope my mail is not a surprise for you, I am writing you by your friends' request. I think they have already told you that I can write you :) I hope they showed you my photo but if it's not clear, I attach another one.

I don't know what Mary and Brett told you but if you want to know something about me, you can always ask. I will answer your questions.
I don't know almost anything about you besides you are a good guy :) I will be very grateful to you if you send me your photo. If you like me, I will tellyou more about me and I will send more photos if you like.

I am coming to Australia in the beginning of August, I hope we can meet and know each other better. I am an easy-going and open person, I am sure, we can be good friends.

If you can, reply me to my email address:

I am waiting for your reply! Please, don't leave my mail unreplied, even if you don't want to communicate, let me know.

Talk to you later, I hope.

Jane


hmmm.... ponders....

( . )( . ) dijo...
Este comentario ha sido eliminado por el autor.
SpanishGoth dijo...

(.)(.) -> You can borrow my bionic arms if you want. I had asked for a bionic dick but apparently Satan Claws wasn't listening.

As for the mail - yeah, fucking right - I'd be there at the airport (with a high powered rifle)