New Testament - The Hobbit

As The Goth has entered a new environment, he has encountered new characters. All of these 'people' he has had to add a label to in order to remember their names, rank, habits etc. One has to bear in mind that being a lazy bastard, I don't really work for Mrs Miggins at the corner shop - so I lean toward global corporations - except McDonalds, who are a bunch of twats.

Obviously, one has to be slightly discreet in describing your cow-workers, in case the muppets actually read this shit but, in keeping with true Goth Policy - maybe not, as I don't give a fuck.

Introducing - Number 1 - The Hobbit.

Head of new shit - apparently he got promoted from looking after old shit. Wandering around the office looking for his ring, he is a desolate figure - with no hair. I'm somewhat tempted to offer to superglue my offcuts to his head but maybe he wants to look like a midget version of Michael Stipe ?!

The Hobbit was my first point of contact on my way to Mount Doom and he still hasn't introduced me to Doom - I just have to assume she is a babe by the way that he dribbles when he talks about her.

In the meantime, I have to circumvent his inane questions about mathematical functions. It kind of reminds me of being back in school and being asked why 'we' have quadratic equations. Apparently, "because there's a lot of sad bastards in the world with nothing better to do" is not the correct answer.

Talking of sad bastards, The Hobbit relishes the prospect of night support. Now, as a Goth, I appreciate the vampire hours more than most but not if some wanker in Venezuela can't make their printer create an invoice. Fuck off and don't be calling me at 3 am !!!

I think The Hobbit is starting to appreciate the fact that I don't actually care that his 'precious' system doesn't do what it is supposed to. Guess what, I think - out loud, your inadequacies are what created my job.

Of course, if he starts eating raw fish and stating "We likes them wet and wwwwwriggling" I will have to drop 16 tons on his head !!

Welcome to my world.......