jueves, diciembre 28, 2006

Karma

What goes around comes around. Or as the Reverend Earl J Hickey says "Do good things and good things happen to you, do bad things and....bad things happen to you".

Shit doesn't work for me. I tried being a nicer person but here I am - same place/same situation. Stupid time in the morning stuck with an erection you could swat squirrels with and no-one to play with. "Watch it fella, you could take somebodys eye out with that!". Highly unlikely I think. I don't think that my inch and a half of wriggling fury has to be registered as a lethal weapon just yet.

Poetry.com have announced that I am to be entered into their hall of fame. Wow, the little fella calmed down at the mention of their name. Probably bored the shit out of him like it does me. I know I can write poetry - I don't need some pompous twit to confirm it for me. I was just utilising the free web space and funky free printouts.

Now I just need to figure out how to take over the world. "Bwah ha ha" *in comicly Dr Evil fashion*. Actually, I don't know that I want to take over any world. It seems screwed up enough already without my intervention. If there is a Goth, I'm fairly sure that he/she/it was sufficiently stoned whilst manufacturing this existing enigma.

So, I'm off to see the doctor to get myself some viagra. I don't actually need it but I'm curious to see what will happen if I do take some - watch out squirrels ;-) The last time I saw Dr Irrelevant, he suggested/prescribed Xanax.

I didn't quite understand his instructions about dosages but did get the bit where he said - "do not mix with alcohol". To me, that's kind of like saying "do not piss into the wind".

Suitably tabletted up I drank a couple of beers. Strangest thing happened - I saved loads of money on beer. I scooted right past the drink loads of beer thing and straight to the walk into furniture mode. I would have pissed myself laughing if I knew who/what/why I was. Next time I saw Dr Strangelove he seemed somewhat put out.

Apparently I had taken 8 times the correct dosage even before I mixed it with alcohol. "But that was enough to knock an elephant out" - didn't work dude - skinny Goth takes the trophy!! Was still funny as fook! Hidden the rest of the tablets somewhere.....don't know where (but then they wouldn't be hidden if I did know).

Oh well, I suppose I can go back to bed now. Final quote from Rev. Hickey - "I'm just trying to be a better person".

a luego,
S

4 comentarios:

Tippler dijo...

One-and-a-half inches?

You fookin show off...

SpanishGoth dijo...

Only erect dude. No need to be jealous. But, note that is without sweetcorn on the end ;-)

HillCountryGal dijo...

That is a hell of an erection, dude. Don't know about over there, but here, the docs are Viagra pushers. Whether you need 'em or not. And OMFG, the online Viagra pushers are relentless.
Next time, try a V instead of Xanax. Beautifully vivid, magnificently colored dreams.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Honey,

I didn't want magnificent dreams, just a way to relieve myself of the blood pressure issue without reverting to adolescence (and preferably without paying for it).

a luego chica,
S