domingo, septiembre 09, 2007

Mug That, Twat

Being Gothic, I am not a violent person by nature. If I sense agitation I move myself to the other side of the room, bar or country.

I don't like fighting for a reason, and it's not because it might chip my nail polish. I don't fight because I cannot control the rage inside me. I have tried Karate, Judo, Kung Fu, Kendo and other martial arts but none really allowed me to stop what will happen.

Guess what. It fucking happened again. I am not proud of myself at all, my knee hurts, I have teeth marks on my elbow and my beloved Mariposa worries about me when the doorbell rings - it might be the police.

Scenario

It's a birthday party for my best friend and his lover - I want to go but, there's a feeling that I should not. Not because I don't want to, but more a case of a feeling of impending doom. Fortunately, Mariposa has made other plans so I am on my own and don't have to protect her.

Party? Tremendous. Lots of very nice people having fun and being, well, generally nice. Everything goes in a splendidly fabtastic fashion but, I have to leave. I drink the Birthday Boys Jack Daniels, we hug (in a continetal, not gay way) and everything is super.

And so, off to the Metro I jolly well go.

*Except, it can't be that fucking easy*

First, it started with the 'give me a cigarette' thing. Not 'can I have a cigarette?' - that would be too polite although I suppose it didn't help when I said "Fuck off, I don't smoke" whilst smoking a cigarette. Anyway, suddenly it changed from cigarettes to money and the one became three.

They didn't want some money, they wanted all of it, and my phone and fuck knows what.

I lost it then.

Consequence

I still have all my money, my phone et al. I also have a very sore left leg, teeth marks on my right elbow, my right palm is sore and I am worrying that the police might be knocking on my door at any moment to arrest me.

The nice side of me sighs and says "I did warn you" whereas the Gothic side of me says "What are the cunts going to say? We were trying to mug someone and got our arses kicked".

Knowing Belgium, I'm still waiting for the bell to ring.

35 comentarios:

MKWM dijo...

Tremendous marathon party... and lovely breakfast.

So now we know why you had to leave at that precise moment, it was bound to happen, wasn't it? I bet they wanted your lovely T-shirt as well. Many many thanks Goth Master, that bunch won't dare bothering people for a very long time. If the police needs to find you, it might be to thank you for doing their job.

kimmyk dijo...

sorry to hear that all went down.
i hope you're feeling better today.

if they didn't get your wallet, then they shouldn't know where you live or who you are to send the police to your door.

i'm sure things will be fine. just take care of yourself.

john.g. dijo...

Kick the f*ckers to death, scum!

Dip-Dop-Crabtree dijo...

A trick like that arrives at me, and although I is polished and follower of the not violence I says to them:

Cassez vous p'tits cons ( Break you p' tits idiots ), faite pas chier l'bonhomme ( done not to dump l'bonhomme ), si vous voulez la castagne et les bourres pif vous allez être servi !!!!( If you want the castagne and the fillings nose you go to be served !!!) Et ni une ni deux avant qu'ils aient le temps de crier maman !( And neither one nor two before they have the time to shout mom!) une distribution gratuite de giroflées à cinq feuilles pour l'apéro ( a free distribution of giroflées with five sheets for the aperitif ),suivi de mornifles un peut plus soutenues au travers de la tronche ( follow-up of mornifles one can more constant through the mug ),de quoi leur faire trois tours dans leurs godasses sans toucher leur lacets et ensuite d'un jeux de jambes quelques coups de lattes dans l'ognon ( Of what to make them three tours in their shoes without getting them laces and then of one games of legs some knocks of slats in the onion ) ,avant de les achever à terre façon paillasson !( before completing them with ground way door mat! )
Non mais tout de même !! Et la politesse ? Bordel !!( No but all the same!! And the politeness? brothel !!)

Cela m'est déjà arrivé pour l'honneur d'une Dame !!
It already arrived at me for the honor of a Lady !!

Sewmouse dijo...

I think you deserve a medal.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Minky -> Lovely to see you again my dear and I did not get blood on the T-shirt

Kimmy -> I'm hobbling less today but still feel good about twatting rats that deserved it

JG -> You would have laughed if you were there

Dip-Dop -> If I would have spent the same time reading your observations - my arse would be toast

Sewmouse -> thanks but I just reacted

Dip-Dop-Crabtree dijo...

OK! I understood !!! Good courage!

Princess of the Universe dijo...

Life's just never boring around you is it Goth?

SpanishGoth dijo...

Dip-Dop -> I didn't mean to be rude my friend :(

Princess -> boring? I wish

yorlor dijo...

...oh, bother. mend well, my friend.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Yorlor -> Scheiss passiert aber ich würde es bevorzugen, mich selbst zu sein, als jemand schwächer (which basically means, rather me than someone weaker)

Dip-Dop-Crabtree dijo...

I did not take him as a rudeness !!
My intention was only to put a funny note!
I did not make tale to be a too long bit and miss so humor?
My way of saying to you that your reaction was healthy and instinctive!

I shall make shorter...

SpanishGoth dijo...

Dip-Dop -> I am going to come down to France and slap you with a large mackerel.

You will not make me sad or offend me. Sometimes it is difficult as your mother-tongue is French so I have to translate into French and back but I get there... eventually.

And don't call me shorty ;-)

Ani dijo...

Living in a big boozy city, I often wonder what I'd do in that situation. Specially as I most likely won't have the upper hand, physically.

I've narrowed it down to screaming like a banshee on crack (which I seem to have a natural talent for anyway).

Hope you're not too badly hurt, Goth. ;)

Anónimo dijo...

Oh God. Why didn't you come back to the party? We'd have looked after you.
So sorry it happened - bastards.
And Minky is right, it was a fab party and even fabber breakfast.
Vida

Dip-Dop-Crabtree dijo...

D'accord !" Méa culpa " Spare the rod and spoil the child, me tightens the cheek, and I pay you a glass...

Stacie dijo...

Oh those rat bastards! I'm so sorry this happened Goth, if I'd been there, I'd have thrown a few punches on your behalf! It's been a while since I've been involved in a good ass kicking, and I rather think I'd enjoy taking someone down like that. If the police knock on your door, ask them where the fuck they were when you were being mugged. I bet they let you off the hook for doing their job for them.
Hugs,
Stacie

PI dijo...

I don't understand. What were you supposed to do? I'm really glad you weren't stabbed ot shot at.

Brom dijo...

Hat's off to you man!

A bit of training from the Valleys in there no doubt!

The Aunt dijo...

My hero.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Ani -> As far as physical prescences go, I am not the biggest house on the block - less to aim at though ;-)

Vida -> No worries my love - scheiss passiert, but thankyou for your concern

Dip-Dop -> Tu apportes les verres et j'apporte le vin mon ami

Stacie -> would not. If you were there I would have avoided the situation anyway and I didn't get mugged - was just an attempted thing

Pat -> I have nearly been stabbed before but I went a bit mental and thus it's ok

Brom -> I don't know about training from 'the Valleys' but I can escape from Merthyr without damage

EVERYONE _ THANKYOU FOR YOUR CONCERN, I DO APPRECIATE IT

and as for the Police

FUCK THA POLICE

SpanishGoth dijo...

Ooops - Aunty M -> yx - do I have to get a silly outfit or will the normal wardrobe do?

Tippler dijo...

Saw two dogs fighting this morning, Gothster.

Really, really going at it while their female owners screamed at one another.

Thought of you giving those twats a good hiding, mate. Nice one.

And thanks for being there earlier.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Sounds a bit like the old Indian naming convention where the young redskin asks how their names are chosen so his father explains about the first thing the mother sees after giving birth is how the name is chosen...

"But why do you ask, Two Dogs Fucking?"

As for the party - no problemo matey

yorlor dijo...

from one set of broad set of shoulders to another, my friend.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Too skinny to have broad shoulders - think more of an elf like appearance ;-)

yorlor dijo...

well, then, stay a moment here under my umbrella and we'll be off together.

Mr Farty dijo...

My hero too. I'd have run like fuck.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Yorlor -> are you turning into Mary Poppins?

Mr Farty -> not proud of it but am glad of the martial arts I did for years

yorlor dijo...

ah... funny you should ask. she is an alter ego of mine. except my chinmney sweep's a chica.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Yorlor -> at least your chimney sweep's not 5 years old like these poor bastards

yorlor dijo...

note to self: goth is never left in charge of bed time stories... unless reading to ed gorey.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Note to Yorlor :-> Goth is very good in bed

(well, it might have worked)

Daphne Wayne-Bough dijo...

Just missed you at the party, if you'd stayed another five minutes you'd have had to stay and talk to me for a bit and would have missed those little scumbags at the metro. So it's ALL MY FAULT. I'll buy you a pint next time I see you. You de daddy.

SpanishGoth dijo...

Sorry I missed you but, anything that transpired was all my fault... sort of