The Perfect Ringtone

For me, is the silent one. Mmm, let it vibrate in your pocket like, a little hamster on a wheel going mental in a very small place. (It's not really a hamster, I just liked the analogy).

I like Nokia, as a company, they haven't pissed about with the "oooo sorry Sir, you will need a totally different charger for that phone", which is very helpful when you travel a lot - NOT. Your mental process goes from:- 'Oh for fucks sake I forgot my charger and now my phone doesn't work' to 'thankyou barman, or hotel receptionist for supplying just the one I need' ooooo feeling calm now

AND, with Nokia, you have always been able to change the ringtone from the complete dross that they provide to something bizarre - even when you had to program the tone in yourself. Boring, but effective.

I had one of those Shitberry things for a while, and what a bucket of toss that was. It was designed for people with very small fingers, or very accurate nails. The worst thing was, you couldn't change the ring tone to something other than 'ladybirds farting on a mushroom' or something.

That's the whole point of having a mobile phone. Pissing people off with the ring tone.

Yeah, yeah, I know it's not big and it's not clever, but it is funny as fuck at times.

Normally, I take my phone everywhere with me, but when I get a sufficiently annoying ringtone, I will leave it on my desk and phone myself from a landline just to watch people tear their hair out. This was particularly fun, por ejemplo, when I had programmed 'Europe - The Final Countdown' in as a ringtone.

At present, anyone who knows me, in real life, knows that I had 'Queens of The Stone Age - No One Knows' as my last ringtone, and before that 'HIM - Buried Alive By Love'. BUT, I have changed it - to the perfect ringtone.......

So, you can either guess what my new one is, or suggest your own ( and no, there are no fucking prizes)