domingo, enero 21, 2007

Speaking Tongues

I'm not really an advocate of speaking in foreign languages - well, that's not true actually. When in Rome, do as the Romans do - build straight roads, invent central heating or, well, cheat, get Roman Lotsofmoneyvich to buy stuff/players that no-one wants. In other words, buy/steal/beg your way out of trouble and if all else fails, revert to monkey-talk and point in the direction of things you want, accompanied with a grunt *points finger* 'Guargh! - Me'

OK - Not entirely true because I can speak several languages, if I choose to, I just chose to be cleverer and get myself a girlfriend who speaks a zillion languages ..... fluently ..... and gets paid to do so. Not only that, but Gothess can hold conversations with 5 different people in 5 different languages - at the same time. Ha ha, can't fix a computer though...Eek, more work for me to do.

Unfortunately, as I deserved, I have been well and truly butt-fooked by yours truly (that will be me then - just want to clarify this). Indeed, I made the announcement (just showing off really but now it is for real) that I would speak Frency fluently by the end of January. DOH. Stupid boy. So now I have the ultimate non-Goth daily timetable ->

Get up before Dawn breaks wind (in French)
Jump onto Metro with smelly twats (in French)
Jump onto train with coffee (in French)
Work like stuff - all in fooking French
Return to Bat Cave (suitably exhausted)

Unfortunately, being a rather gobby (outspoken) Goth - everyone this side of China knows about this promise and thus are engaging me in French conversations. Even my little Greek buddy, A, who I was teaching Welsh to, insists now that I speak to him in French. Thank Goth his 'better-half' has delivered the baby girl (Goth bless her) and he is so knackered that he can't even see straight, let alone, think/talk straight.

'Say it in French and I will correct you' - yeah, fook off and .... oh, you're asleep then. Breast feeding sounds great but in reality, it sucks.

I get pinged every day with mails announcing jobs with shit loads of cash - if you speak French/Flemish/Spanish etc. Sorry muppets, if it's to do with puters, it will be in English or pseudo-English (otherwise known as American).

I'd only just passed my course in Spanish, now I have to return to French - putain!!!

a bientot,

2 comentarios:

MKWM dijo...

Pardon?! PU****?!
You sure know all the French F words, (Web)Master. You ought to say "punaise" or else "purée".

SpanishGoth dijo...

First part of learning any language is how to swear in it first. It's also a good indicator of what someone's 'mother-tongue' is - wait for them to twat their finger with a hammer and listen to which language they swear in ;-)