lunes, noviembre 20, 2006

The Perfect (female) Day

Ha ha - figured it out eventually. The perfect day for a woman done and dusted (I think) The non-schedule runs something like this:-
  • 11 hours sleep in a big comfy bed in complete peace
  • Wake up being cuddled by friendly partner (no sexual intent)
  • Delivered breakfast in bed - weetabix, honey, grapes, cheese, crackers, coffee, fruit juice, chocolate, more fresh fruit and more hot coffee
  • Papers in bed - 3 languages (Clever peeps that speak many languages need the variety)
  • Sun
  • Walk in town - in warm sunshine surveying shoe shops, jewellery shops etc
  • Drink on terrace - large amounts of love in the world - survey in a lazy fashion
  • Back home - buying chocolate cake on the way
  • Buy coffee for homeless person (Leo) and water for his dog Bo
  • Meal prepared, cooked and presented - roast chicken in honey and mustard, potatoes, broccoli with sesame oil and seeds, and other assorted vegetables, gravy in a slightly oriental fashion
  • Chocolate cake
  • Coffee
  • Favourite TV show & film
  • More sleep in said comfy bed
In between, at random but at hours/minutes of choosing, that 'making babies' thing.

So endeth the first lesson. Alright, it's maybe not perfect but the complaint box is empty!

Now I need a week to recover - well, maybe not but I am exhausted.

a luego,

8 comentarios:

Tippler dijo...

The 'three-language papers in bed' bit doubtless works but then you ruin it by giving her a copy of the 'Sun'.

Dear me...

MKWM dijo...

How is the 'The Perfect (male) Day' then?

Tippler dijo...

06:00 Alarm
06:15 Blow job
06:30 Massive satisfying dump while reading the sports section
07:00 Breakfast, rump steak and eggs, coffee and toast all cooked
by naked buxom wench.
07:30 Limo arrives
07:45 Several whiskies en-route to airport
09:15 Flight in personal Lear jet
09:30 Limo to St Andrew's golf club (blow job en-route)
09:45 Play front nine (2 under)
11:45 Lunch. Pie, chips and gravy, 3 ciders and bottle of Don Perignon.
12:15 Blow job
12:30 Play back nine (4 under)
14:15 Limo back to airport (several whiskies)
14:30 Fly to Monte Carlo
15:30 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female crew (all nude)
16:30 Land world record Marlin (1,800 lbs on light tackle)
17:00 Fly home, massage and hand job by Elle McPherson.
18:45 Shit, shower and shave
19:00 Watch news: Michael Jackson assassinated, marijuana and porn legalised.
19:30 Dinner, lobster appetisers, Don Perignon (1953) big juicy steak
followed by Ice cream served on a pair of tits.
21:00 Napoleon brandy and Cohuna cigar in front of wall size TV as you watch international match of the day. England beat Germany 13-0.
21:30 Line of coke, sex with three women (all with lesbian tendencies)
23:00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snack and cleansing ale.
23:30 A night-cap blow job.
23:45 In bed alone
23:50 A 12 second fart which changes pitch 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room.

Hope this helps.

MKWM dijo...

"Mayday Mayday Mayday"...

I don't fully agree with your 'perfect day' lists.

I'm drawing up my own.

SpanishGoth dijo...

I'll get around to the perfect male day - just hasn't happened yet. Seen the version T posted before on the T'internet.

Tomorrow's always another day though....

Daphne Wayne-Bough dijo...

Tone, that made me laugh so much I started coughing again! Give or take the odd Lear jet and the golf, that's my ex you're talking about.

MKWM dijo...

Right Daffers, I had a good laugh myself before starting coughing, recalling my ex and all the bad memories that came in pair, hence the mayday signal.

BTW, I haven't drawn up my list yet.

Tyler dijo...

Oh my God that was fuckin' hilarious.

The perfect (female) day gives me some good ideas for V-Day coming up too.

Molt be, gracies!